Which Parenting Style is Best?
(Source: Pixabay)
I know there is no need to put more pressure on parents.
But your parenting style, however, can significantly impact your child's well-being, personality, and life path.
Finding a parenting method that works for your child is critical.
While authoritative parenting is widely considered to produce the most effective results, parenting is a spectrum.
You may use a different style at distinct moments in their lives.
So, let's talk about which parenting style is best for achieving your goals.
Definition of Parenting Style
Diana Baumrind, a clinical and developmental psychologist, first introduced the concept of different parenting styles in the 1960s.
Through her studies, Baumrind identified three parenting styles associated with child behavior patterns - authoritative, authoritarian, and permissive parenting.
The three parenting styles corresponded to high and low values on the dimensions of responsiveness (warmth) and demandingness (parental control).
Later, psychologists Maccoby and Martin elaborated on Baumrind's findings, describing a fourth parenting style that was low on responsiveness and demandingness that they labeled the uninvolved style.
The 4 types of Parenting Styles
These are the four different parenting styles that researchers have identified so far.
Each has a different parenting approach and leads to distinct outcomes for children.
Let's go over each parenting style:
1- Authoritarian: "Because I Said So."
The authoritarian parenting style is characterized by low responsiveness and high demandingness.
As per Baumrind's research, children related to this style showed a discontented and withdrawn attitude.
Authoritarian parents are often strict with their children, believing in their absolute authority.
As a result, there are usually rules and punishments for not following them.
Unfortunately, this isn't a democratic household, and the feelings and opinions of kids are often left unaddressed.
How to identify authoritarian parents?
They enforce rules (without explaining the reasons)
It's a one-way communication from parent to child
There is little consideration for kid's feelings
Parents tend to punish their children
Impact on Kids:
While authoritarian parenting can form obedient kids, it has adverse outcomes for them, including:
Low self-esteem
Poorer social skills
Lower happiness
Lower academic performance
Behaviors that lead to negative developmental effects, including aggression, somatic complaints, and anxiety.
2- Authoritative: Strong yet Nurturing Guidance
The authoritative parenting style is characterized by high responsiveness and demandingness.
Research shows the authoritative style is associated with assertive, self-reliant child behavior.
Children raised in an authoritative parenting style have consistently been associated with positive developmental results, such as resilience, optimism, and self-reliance.
As well as high academic achievement.
Authoritative parents often provide structure and support, but always from a nurturing standpoint.
Communication is a constant feedback loop, and it's common for parents and kids to problem-solve issues together.
Though clear rules are set, kids often view authoritative parents as fair.
They know their actions have consequences and that it will be hard to "get out of" something.
How to identify authoritative parents?
They set clear rules and expectations (with reasoning explained)
Provide nurturing communication between parent-child
Parents take kid's feelings and opinions into account
Find learning opportunities in kid's experiences
Give support and work toward a positive relationship
Allow for natural consequences of children's behavior
Impact on Kids:
Experts consider that the authoritative parenting style has the most favorable outcomes for child development, including:
Strong independence and self-control
Ability to express feelings and opinions
High self-esteem
Good social skills and quickly makes friends
Higher academic performance
3- Permissive: "Kids Will be Kids."
The permissive parenting style is characterized by high responsiveness and low demandingness.
There is an association between the permissive style, low self-control, and low self-reliance in children.
Permissive parents are often seen more like friends than parents. Usually, the kid calls the shots, and they ignore the rules.
Parents may worry excessively about their kids' happiness and treat them often to win over their affection.
How to identify permissive parents?
No rule enforcement
Communication is inconsistent
Go to great lengths to make the kid happy
Punishment is uncommon
Parents give little directions to their children
Impact on Kids:
Permissive parenting often leads to adverse outcomes, especially in the social life of a child:
Egocentric
Poorer social skills
Difficulty building relationships
Problems with authority figures
Impulsive behavior
Poorer academic performance
4- Uninvolved: "Fend for Yourself."
The uninvolved parenting style, also known as neglectful parenting, is characterized by low responsiveness and demandingness.
The uninvolved parent tends to leave their kids to fend for themselves, whether out of choice (no attachment) or because they're overwhelmed with other areas of life.
Even though they usually meet their children's basic needs, they don't offer direction or support structures.
As a result, it often steers kids without a nurturing figure in their lives.
How to identify uninvolved parents?
There is little to no communication between them.
Parents are emotionally or physically absent from the child's life
Lack of interest in the child's activities
Don't set rules or expectations
Impact on Kids:
Children with uninvolved parents are more likely to engage in drug/alcohol abuse, suicide, and delinquency later in life.
Other adverse effects may include:
Low self-esteem
Difficulty building relationships
Lack of self-control
Poorer academic performance
Every Parent Uses a Range of Styles
It is important to remember that every parent uses different parenting styles during childrearing.
While authoritative parenting usually leads to the most desirable results, there may be times when your child's temperament calls for a different technique.
For example, if your child is going through a particularly challenging period, you may need to use a more permissive parenting method to avoid behavioral problems.
Adopting authoritarian parenting is possible if you believe your child may be in a dangerous situation and cannot fully judge it.
Try to be more aware of your parenting practices and adjust if your parenting style has a negative effect.
Nevertheless, two-parent families must not send mixed signals.
To ensure consistency in expectations, parents should combine their styles and work together as a united front.
So, Which Parenting Style is Best?
As clearly pointed out in the post, authoritative parenting is usually the most effective approach.
Authoritative has the most favorable results, leading to kids with higher self-esteem, independence, social skills, and academic performance.
Yet, there's no one way to parent. Instead, parenting is a continuum so that you may use other parenting styles at different moments in your child's life.
Your Parenting Style is Just the Start
Your parenting style isn't the end-all, be-all of your kid's future.
Your child's well-being and life path involve a combination of personality, culture, social influences, etc.
So try to be your best parent, but don't worry about everything. Parenting is hard enough as it is!
